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Love Letter to Pole Dancing: 11 Things That Make Me Grateful

By on November 27, 2014


I’m overflowing with appreciation for my body, her senses, sensations and wisdom. Even my smile and my cheeks. And this body bliss is all thanks to YOU!

Photos by Michelle Hayes

Photos by Michelle Hayes


I’m grateful to you for so much!


P… is for Playfulness

sunset smooch selfie

sunset smooch selfie


Thank you for the playfulness that infuses my life. For freeing the part of me that once only saw the light with my husband. Like when I twirled around him between kisses on a date.

Because of our fun, I can’t help but find more ways to play in life, even as I work. I wear pink gloves for doing dishes while listening songs to play with you—sometimes while wearing belly dancing coin skirts and shaking my hips. This year I began taking daily dance breaks from my writing. And just this month I found a way to dance while I work—at a stand-up desk.


O… is for Out Of My Comfort Zone Magic

I’m sure you remember how far outside my comfort zone I was when taking my first class.

I was the heaviest and least flexible girl in the class. It was worse than I feared. The others wore form-fitting spaghetti strap tank tops and yoga pants; I wore gym shorts and a baggy Tinker Bell crew neck t-shirt.

You watched me blossom from a scaredy cat, who’s inside foot stuck to the floor like Velcro,  into an evangelist.

About a year ago I wore my favorite booty shorts underneath black yoga pants to a one-day 5 Rhythms workshop for women. Everyone else wore flowy tops, skirts and pants. I got hot and sweaty within the first hour. After a moment of hesitation, I stripped off my pants revealing glittery hot pink shorts

As the day went on other women stripped off layers.

In our closing circle a dancer I admired for her grace and abandon surprised me: “My favorite moment was when you revealed your shiny shorts! It gave me permission to take off my top and feel free, which I don’t do in coed classes.”


L… is for Love Growth Spurts

Remember when I cried every week for a month? Not just during my freestyle dance, but for the entire class.

I couldn’t stop listening to Donny Osmond’s cover of Foreigner’s I Want to Know What Love Is. It made no sense because I’d been happily married for half my life.

Then we danced to I Shall Be Free by Kid Beyond. My heart expanded and filled with divine love from within. After that choosing love over fear became my default reaction.
After a couple more weepy heart blossoming experiences, I dubbed them ‘love growth spurts.’ Because they remind me of the scene when the Grinch’s heart grows three sizes. And he glows with strength and radiance. And chooses love and generosity over hate and fear.


E… is for Elevating Each Other

You enable us to climb, spin and soar. And celebrate each other with hoots hollers, claps and stomps.

A mutual friend recently took a body conditioning class. She expected to hear praise like: “Good work. Great extension on those overhead presses.”

But the positive feedback didn’t happen. Until she told us, her pole dancing friends. We chimed in with cheers and encouragement.

Because of you, we support, encourage, hug and encircle. In and out of the studio. It’s a precious gift I am grateful for every day.


D… is for Desire

It’s what I came to you in search of — feeling desire in my body. I hoped for wisps. You gave me lust.
desireAnd changed a low libido (aka ‘responsive’) woman like me into one who experiences spontaneous desire. I can’t think my way to desire. In fact, too much thinking, typical of the busy mind of us modern women, blocks us from feeling what we desire in our bodies.

You taught me to tap into and stir up desire for sex and other creative outlets with swirling hips and serpentine movements that spread from pelvis to hips, heart, lips and finger tips.

You, my dear pole, are an on switch for the body.  And once the body is awakened, ooh la la!


A… is for Authenticity

Remember when I was afraid I’d never get your tricks? I struggled with them all and felt like Winnie-the-Pooh inching up a tree towards out-of-reach honey.

But then one day a teacher danced for us. She wowed us with your toughest tricks. Then she exhaled a soft sweet sigh as she paused to caress her cheek, throat and chest over her heart. That moment gave me chills.

And I finally understood, for me, it’s not about the crazy tricks. It is about bringing my full authentic self to the dance. And sharing a piece of my unique and vulnerable heart and soul.


N… is for Nature

As metaphor and mentor.

Your teachers brought nature’s symbolism into class. We visualized roots growing below and connecting us like a grove of trees. Over time our moods and struggles synced to each other, the phase of the moon, the seasons and the rhythm of the years.

We danced to themes like embodying elements, spirit animals, destinations and goddess archetypes further enhancing our connection.
Eventually, you tempted me to dance with you on the beach. Sorry, buddy, but you and sand don’t mix. Though I still want to try you in a pool!

I dance the way you taught me – outside with the elements. Feeling the primal power of moving with the sand and the waves. In the sunshine. Under the moon as she rises or sets. With the music of the rain. Among the trees.


C… is for Church

You are my sacred, safe space.

A place to praise and worship. To bare my soul. To ask for support, love and understanding.

To give and receive. Hugs. Chills. Tears.

To cultivate aesthetic capacity. To witness curves that undulate like the shore. To be witnessed.

To heal and transform. With my tribe.


I… is for Insights

Thank you for being my greatest teacher.

You grant me access to the wisdom of my body. You quiet my mind so I can hear. You deepen my self-knowledge. And bring to the surface what I need to know.

When we dance, insights emerge. Sometimes the messages come slowly through feelings or images. Other times immediate clarity bubbles up as an ‘aha’ while we play.

What will we discover next?


N… is for Never Give Up

Why didn’t you tell me it would take me eighteen months to invert for the first time?

Okay, I get it; it might have frightened me away. And it did help me understand that some worthwhile endeavors take a really long time.

Despite my innate persistence and stubbornness, I do have a tendency to get frustrated when things take a longer than I expect.

Dancing with you to ‘never give up’ songs brightens the light at the end of long dark tunnels. And ignites my inner passion when the embers are cooling.


G… is for Glow

Thank you for making me glow. It’s as if every time we touch bit of you rubs off on my skin like flecks of metallic glitter.

I adore seeing it in everyone’s faces and bodies after class.

And it’s so much more than the endorphin high of exercise.

It’s like we’ve plugged into the energy of the sun and the moon. And it shimmers from within.



Lisa Faulkner
Frolic w/ me

Lisa Faulkner

Founder at Siren Institute
Lisa is a feisty tiger who frolics in the sand + around the pole when she's not inspiring others with her educational roar. Play and learn with her at
Lisa Faulkner
Frolic w/ me

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